Six Years and a New Addition

Today is Feather Factor’s six year anniversary….yes, six!

Because I’ve been writing here for so long, and feel that the site has become such a part of my life, I wanted to share some news today with you all – that we’re expecting a new addition to our family, due in summer! I never thought I would be the sort of person to attempt “two under two” (three years ago I hadn’t even heard of the term, and had I been told what it meant, would have probably said it was loony) but oh, how things change when you have kids. I could write a whole separate post on how much we went back and forth on family timing, whether we should group our kids close together, the pros and cons, etc, but I’ll save that for another time (or never, if you guys are bored by the topic).

Instead today, I wanted to share some updates on a few parts of my life since having our first child. The first is related to my job. At the time when I took maternity leave for our first baby, I ended up extending my leave for as long as possible, which at my company was around six months. When that was up I wasn’t really ready to go back yet, but I didn’t have a choice…so I quit. At first I thought I’d just stay at home a bit longer until I felt more ready, and then a few other things got in the way. My husband’s work travel schedule became quite extreme for a while, and all the jobs I really wanted, required me to travel a lot as well. I didn’t see how it could work to have both of us gone frequently, sometimes at the same time, with a young baby at home. I know that plenty of other families thrive in this situation and I’m sure we could manage too, but at the end of the day I made a certain decision. Which I’ve been mostly happy with, but at times it has been a great struggle.

I never thought that I’d be at home with a baby (or babies)…for what at this point, is looking like at least a few years, before I can go back to work, hopefully for good. This was never, ever the life I expected for myself…it wasn’t even a hazy scenario I entertained a few years back. I put quite a lot into my work and career, obtained an overpriced graduate school education…no way was I going to put that on pause. But it’s happened, and like many topics regarding motherhood I could write a whole book and the whys and hows…but I won’t for now. All I’ll say for now is that I feel so much guilt, guilt every day. Guilt for taking a break from my career, guilt for being at home, but most of all guilt for complaining at all because I know that not having to work is an immense privilege in itself. Oh man.

There’s been a lot of ups and downs. I had an early miscarriage right before this pregnancy, so I feel like I can never breathe totally easy with this one…there’s always this part of me that has a great fear. When it happened it was something I kept quite secret and close to me. I often felt alone afterwards…even though it was early on, it was more distressing than I thought it’d be. Until I wrote this I had only told a small group of people, and encountered such a range of reactions…both incredible consideration and kindness, as well a surprising lack of sensitivity. I hope that by writing about my experience I can add my voice to the many which already exist out there. I’m constantly haunted by fears of it happening again. Unlike with my first pregnancy, I find myself looking forward to every doctor’s appointment, no matter how inconvenient, because it’s one additional check point I have that our baby is doing okay.

Besides those fears, the pregnancy has been going fine, though I’m having a tougher time this round than the first. I can definitely feel that my body is older this time…and having a toddler is already aging it exponentially! I’ve been sick constantly, my skin is going crazy, and I also feel like I’m just “showing” my belly so much earlier…I kind of feel like my body is saying to me, “That’s it! You’re doing this to me again, I give up, I’m going to just let the stomach out….out….all the way, yup, that’s more like it.” That being said, of course these are minor complaints compared to the happiness of having a baby. When I first realized we were going to have another kid I was absolutely terrified of how to manage two little ones (and still am), but each day I’m more and more excited to add another member to our family.

Thank you all so much for reading along with me all these years, and for allowing me to share my joy with you. So thank you, thank you again, I mean it more sincerely than I can adequately express.

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  • Marta
    March 6, 2017 at 8:35 am

    Congratulations! I’m so happy for you! I’m sure everything will go to plan and that baby is gonna grow up happy and proud to have a mum like you.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:29 pm

      Thank you Marta! What a wonderful thing to say.

  • Nancy
    March 6, 2017 at 8:45 am

    Congrats Kat! I’m been reading your blog for several years now, started back when I was in school at Berkeley (Go Bears!). Although I only recently joined the working world, I can only start to understand the guilt and pressure you feel, especially as an educated woman. I also want to start a family someday, and it’s refreshing to see someone admit that there are sacrifices that have to be made. I want at least 2 or even 3 kids, but not sure how that would impact my career (I’m not even married yet but I’m already worried).

    I grew up in the Bay Area, where many of my friends’ parents were in similar situations. One of my good friend’s mother actually went back to work after years of working part time when we were in school. I look forward to hearing more about your journey!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:30 pm

      Thank you Nancy for reading all these years (And Go Bears!). Living in the Bay Area definitely makes certain aspects harder. Enjoy your time now and best of luck with your career.

  • Sonya
    March 6, 2017 at 9:06 am

    I have been reading your site for many years. I’m so happy to hear this news! And do take care of yourself. People can make pregnancies and babies about “THEM”, but remember that it is about you and your husband and soon to be two little ones.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:32 pm

      Thanks Sonya, and thanks for reading all these years! Yes, we’ve been trying to focus on our family and keeping healthy.

  • Petti
    March 6, 2017 at 9:24 am

    Congratulations and I’m so happy for you! Take care!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:32 pm

      Thank you Petti!

  • Anonymous
    March 6, 2017 at 9:28 am

    Congratulations! That is such great news, although at the same time, I am so sorry to hear about your prior loss. I appreciate you being so forthcoming about it; so many women experience the pain of such a loss, which is actually so common, but the silence that surrounds the issue makes it so isolating, like you said.

    Every working mother I know feels the guilt. I know I do. My husband is a physician, I am nearing the end of my training as a resident, and we have a 1 yr old. We have been through nannies and daycare, and the struggle never ends. I often just want to stop and quit and stay home with my cooing cute baby. I just have to keep telling myself that I have to pull through training though, and then Ill have a choice. It means so much to me that you’ve described your difficulties, and that there are people out there who can commiserate. I really think there is no right answer, and the guilt never dissappears with whatever you ultimately decide.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:34 pm

      Thank you for your words and for sharing your experience. I can’t imagine what it is like to go through residency with a 1 year old! You are superwoman in my book.

  • Katherine
    March 6, 2017 at 9:29 am

    Congrats and I would love to read more on your choices on family timing seeming as I have just become a mother of one 🙂 and planning a second but not sure of timing 🙂

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:34 pm

      Thank you Katherine and congrats on your little one!

  • E
    March 6, 2017 at 9:37 am

    Hi Kat! I am so proud of you to share your personal life and struggles with your readers. For someone who is accomplished so much, it must have been hard for you to quit your job to be a stay-at-home mother. It would be great to hear more about your journey!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:35 pm

      Thanks E! I don’t feel like I’m very accomplished at all but thanks for your kind words 🙂 I’ll try to do another post on the topic.

  • Emily
    March 6, 2017 at 9:37 am

    Congratulations on #2! I went back to work after a 4 month maternity leave and it’s still so hard to juggle everyday. I’m seriously contemplating a break in my career but after all that investment in college and grad school, and the ever-increasing cost of living in the Bay Area, it gives me heart palpitations to consider not working. Other days, I keep telling myself that my kid won’t care about having a bigger house with a yard but he will care if his parents are never around because they’re so busy working. I think? I hope? I don’t know.

    As much as I want to believe Sheryl Sandberg that it’s possible to lean into your career…it’s just so hard. I don’t want to make a lot of money to pay other people to take care of my LO, I want to spend time with him myself. Do you ever worry that it will be hard to get back into the workforce after taking some time off? Especially since Silicon Valley seems to be getting increasingly younger…ahh.

    Would love to hear more of your thoughts on motherhood, leaning in/out, and spacing out children, as I’m in a similar phase in life!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:36 pm

      I completely understand and agree….and yes, isn’t the Bay Area lovely? I think your kid will respect you for doing what was best for you and your career, you sound like a wonderful mother. Yes I do worry about that, all the time, though I hope that some of what I worked towards before can help me when it’s time to go back.

  • Kristen
    March 6, 2017 at 9:52 am

    First of all, a huge congratulations! Babies are such a blessing. Your story is very similar to mine and I know the guilt you describe in your post. I took lots of time off with both kids and am now just easing back into 2 days per week. It’s a tough balance and I question myself often. I look forward to reading more.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:37 pm

      Thank you Kristen. It’s always comforting to read about others with the same experience and struggles as you. Two days a week sounds like a great balance right now 🙂

  • Michelle
    March 6, 2017 at 9:58 am

    Congratulations! What wonderful news! Thank you for sharing such intimate details. Very sorry to hear about your loss. I can commiserate with the anxiety felt with each Doc appointment since I had a challenging pregnancy with the twins. The choice to be a SAHM must not have been easy for you. I am happy that you are able to make this choice. I agree that we want to be there for our kids when they are growing up. I am thankful that my job does not involve travel and does allow me flexibility to take time off to be at school events. Not many have this luxury and I am immensely grateful everyday. I do have to remind myself about this plus point, especially when I am working on challenging projects 😀 Hang in there Kat. You can do it!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:38 pm

      Thanks so much Michelle. I think you’re so accomplished with your three adorable strawberries and still making those amazing meals every night! I want to come over for dinner!

  • bisbee
    March 6, 2017 at 10:05 am

    Congratulations! So sorry about the loss..but now you have another baby to look forward to! I understand the anxiety, especially after the miscarriage. I didn’t have that, but I did have surgery in between my pregnancies, and I was warned constantly that the second could be problematic. I just couldn’t relax until near the end, so I feel for you! Try to stay calm, take care of yourself and the little Feather you already have, and the time will go quickly! I’m sure your readers will enjoy reading whatever you choose to share…

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:38 pm

      Thank you Bisbee! And I’m sure the worry after surgery must have been significant, I’m so glad to hear your second pregnancy went well.

  • Anonymous
    March 6, 2017 at 10:05 am

    Congrats and happy anniversary!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:38 pm

      Thank you!

  • C.Michol
    March 6, 2017 at 10:21 am

    Congratulations! Regarding guilt….I don’t feel like any woman under 50 feels like she’s got everything together and is doing everything exactly right. We put too much pressure on ourselves! Enjoy your family and your time with them. Sometimes having it all, means having it all at different times.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:39 pm

      Thank you C, your words were comforting to read, to know I’m not alone 🙂

  • Emily
    March 6, 2017 at 10:24 am

    Congrats on your 6 year anniversary! I’ve been a follower since this blog started and have enjoyed all your posts and how they have evolved over time. As a physician mom of two girls age 4.5 and 2.5 years old, it can be tough to balance career and family. I too also had a miscarriage/blighted ovum in between my two girls. Happy to hear that number 2 is coming but it’s definitely harder with two! All the free time you had with one child becomes practically nonexistent. I wouldn’t trade it for the world….especially when I see my two girls playing together and loving each other so much….right before they fight! Ha ha ha. Hope you are able to rest well before the new baby comes. So amazed that you find time to keep this blog going and hope you continue to. 🙂

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:40 pm

      Thank you Emily and I’m so sorry to hear about what you went through. I’m happy to hear about your two girls and the fact that you are a physician is really inspiring. I’m looking forward to this “playing together” everyone tells me about, I know until then it might be a little more challenging 🙂

  • Dawn in Sac
    March 6, 2017 at 10:33 am

    Congrats on bundle number 2. Enjoy the changes life throws at you…and follow your heart. If it say wait working for while and be mom then so be it. I quit my traveling and financially rewarding career to become mom. That was 17 years ago and while I went back to work 50% time six years ago, I have not regretted having time with my kids at home. I know this time passes all too fast and that in hindsight it would be easier for pass over the participating in owning the last release of a special handbag or traveling off for extra long vacations then to passover my children childhood. While I will say it is hard to reenter back to the level I was pre kids professionally, I can say that I am not as interested in climbing professionally as I was pre kids. Best wishes for a safe and uneventful pregnancy.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:40 pm

      Thank you Dawn and I feel better reading about experiences like yours. It sounds like you made all the right decisions for you and your family!

  • Wei Lin
    March 6, 2017 at 10:42 am

    Congratulations! We can be bump buddies 😉 I totally know how you feel about the career thing. I feel guilty all the time for being able to stay at home. But I enjoy every moment with my little one bc I know they won’t stay little for long! As for your fears of miscarriage, I’ve had 3…so you can imagine how freaked out I get with every cramp or twinge. I truly believe that there’s a reason for everything and all we can do is embrace what we’re blessed with-good or bad. Would love to meet up for a play date sometime! Take care!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 7:41 pm

      Hi Wei! I didn’t know you were pregnant, congratulations!! And I’m so sorry to hear about your miscarriages, I had no idea. I’d love to get together 🙂

  • Christine
    March 6, 2017 at 10:42 am

    Dear Kat,
    Congratulations on your news!
    I’m so sorry about your loss and how hard it must have been for you.
    We delayed starting a family. I spent 8.5 years in college and was happy in my job. However, when I had my first child at 40, and returned to work after an eight week maternity leave, I knew it wasn’t for me. The large company I worked for was bought out six months after my return. I was glad to find myself a SAHM. I had my second child at 44. My youngest son is now a sophomore in college. I know my husband and I are the age of other students’ grandparents…but one needs to do what is right for one’s own situation.
    I have always had a love for fashion, and I started to work on weekends for a luxury retailer. It was a nice balance for me. I could dress up and interact with people.
    I have used my education to instill a love of learning within my sons. I never felt leaving the workforce was the wrong choice for me.
    It really depends on the person and the family dynamics.
    You will find the right direction as time unfolds.
    Take care!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:02 pm

      You sound like you are a wonderful mother and have a wonderful family. Thank you for sharing your own experience and for your kind words.

  • h
    March 6, 2017 at 10:47 am

    Congratulations and thank you for writing this. I do not have children but I wonder how it will ever be possible in my career path in the next ~5 years. If/when I do, it will require hard choices. I appreciate your talking about this honestly and in a public place.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:03 pm

      It is tough and there’s no “perfect solution” but at the same time I wouldn’t worry too much about it now. Enjoy your career and free time for now 🙂

  • Julie W.
    March 6, 2017 at 10:51 am

    First of all, congratulations! And thank you so much for this very honest and touching post and sharing with all of us. I can imagine myself and my husband going through similar struggles when we decide to have a baby, especially since at this point, I’m the main bread winner for our family. I’m so sorry about your early miscarriage, and we are all crossing our fingers that the rest of your pregnancy goes well! Best of luck!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:03 pm

      Thank you Julie! Best of luck when you guys plan your family, enjoy your time as a couple for now!

  • Cassie
    March 6, 2017 at 11:02 am

    Congratulations on both the baby and the blogoversary!

    It’s quite the emotional minefield dealing with being at home after working so hard to build a career, isn’t it? Even though you’re wracked with guilt at the moment, only you and your husband will know what is right for your family. If this decision is the right one for your situation, then it’s the right one. Be gentle on yourself 🙂

    I commend you for talking about your early miscarriage. Miscarriage is such a sensitive subject, and despite the relative frequency so many women endure it alone. I had an early miscarriage before getting pregnant with my son, and the fear of losing him endured until the moment I heard that first cry. I hope your nausea settles down for you soon. You look beautiful!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:04 pm

      Thank you so much for sharing your experience and your kind words. I know I’ll feel the same way during this pregnancy – hearing that cry.

  • Nina
    March 6, 2017 at 11:11 am

    Congrats Kat! I’m so happy for you. I’ve been reading your blog for quite some time now. I always look forward to reading it every Monday and Friday morning. I also had a baby boy around the same time you had your first. It’s really not easy giving up work and it’s even tougher being a stay at home mom. You’ve made an excellent choice and I’m sure you’ll do great. We are also thinking of trying this year since my son is 18 months old and I’ve always been advised that it’s best to keep them less than 3 years apart. I’ve just been promoted so work will keep me busy for some time but I’d love to hear your advise on family timing.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:05 pm

      Thanks so much Nina and congrats on your little one too. I heard the same about the 3 years but also heard from others than more than 3 years is also great, cause they can help out. So either way I think it works out.

  • Susie Tunes
    March 6, 2017 at 11:19 am

    Congratulations Kat and thankyou for sharing your experiences, both happy and sad, so honestly.

    Best wishes xx

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:05 pm

      Thank you Susie!

  • Diane
    March 6, 2017 at 11:52 am

    Congratulations Katherine!!! Take good care of yourself and Don’t stress about when you’ll go back to work. This time is precious and it’ll quickly fly away. All the best Katherine, I’m sure you’ll do great!!!
    Xoxo Diane

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:05 pm

      Thanks very much Diane 🙂

  • Anonymous
    March 6, 2017 at 12:00 pm

    Congratulations to you and your family on your amazing news, Kat! And I am very sorry to hear of your earlier miscarriage. Motherhood is such an emotional journey. The worrying has never stopped for me. When your kids are able to play together, it will be so much fun to watch (although expect to lose your voice yelling them at times)! The fact that you are able and willing to stay home only benefits your kids. I’ve realized certain aspects almost demand a parent’s involvement, and trying to squeeze instilling values and education into limited time together is challenging. Please take good care and do keep us posted!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:06 pm

      Thanks so much! And I laughed about the part about losing your voice…I’m expecting this!

  • Susan
    March 6, 2017 at 12:07 pm

    Congratulations, Katherine! You are such an elegant, beautiful and stylish Mom. 🙂 So happy for you!
    Thanks also for sharing about what you have been going through recently. I also went through a miscarriage and encountered both compassion and insensitivity, so I can understand. It made me withdraw a lot. It’s so common but still seems to have a lot of misconceptions surrounding it.
    I’m also expecting our second this summer, and I go through guilt every day… I’m in an academic career where it’s hard/inconceivable to take a long time away from work. It’s hard to reconcile my desires to continue my career trajectory and my desire to spend as much time as possible with our kids. It’s also the constant pros/cons and back and forth regarding child care, finances, etc.

    Just want to say I totally understand the difficulties in making these decisions. You are doing an amazing job, mama! And please continue to post some mommy posts from time to time. I love your posts and the comments as well, and judging from the comment section, it seems this topic resonates with a lot of your readers!

    Congrats again on the wonderful news!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:08 pm

      Hi Susan, thanks so much for your kind words and for sharing your own experience and struggles. I’m so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I’ve heard the same things about academia and I know that there are some very tough constraints. Best of luck with your second…I hope we can stay comfortable in the summer heat!

  • Caroline
    March 6, 2017 at 12:15 pm

    Congratulations!!!! So happy for you and your husband.
    I have a toddler slightly older than yours (born in April 2015) and my very challenging pregnancy made me rethink the whole motherhood picture as well. I haven’t gone back to work since. I do feel guilty but like you i didn’t see myself leaving my child in the care of someone else. My education cost me a lot of money and i had a promising career but i’ll get back to it in due time. I’m trying for n2 (still hasn’t happened yet unfortunately) but meanwhile i’m trying to work in my own project to potentially work from home.
    Best of luck! Been reading your blog for many years now and always look forward to your posts.
    Congratulations again!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:09 pm

      Thank you Caroline! I am hoping for you for number two soon!

  • Kitty
    March 6, 2017 at 12:32 pm

    Congratulations with the pregnancy and taking time off! I did it for 3 years and it’s tough especially when you leave behind a good career. Even a bad career, it’s tough. All of the sudden you are a mommy and that’s it. But you are not, it just might feel that way. All I can say is to enjoy it and embrace it because it will go by fast and your career will come back again. I just went back to work 9 months ago and miss the time I had, though my babies are now in daycare and kindy and don’t need me as much. It’s an amazing privilege to be able to take the time for you and your family. I didn’t plan for it either, but the decision kind of formed itself like yours it sounds like. Sometimes trusting your gut is the best thing in life 🙂 hope you have an amazing pregnancy. my kids are 2 and 3 months apart btw. sucks in the beginning but they are bffs now!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:10 pm

      Thanks so much Kitty! In particular for sharing about your kids, I’ve heard the exact same thing….hard in the beginning, but worth it when they are such good friends 🙂

  • Trang
    March 6, 2017 at 12:48 pm

    Congrats Kat! I used to read a tons of blogs and now, yours is out of probably 2-3 blogs that I still read so thank you for all your time putting into it.

    I took almost 4 years off and to be honest, I still ask myself what if I had not done that, how my career would have been today. I’m happy to be back working now but I’m also thankful to be able to stay at home. The time I spent away from work definitely helps me appreciate my current job a lot more!

    Not many people know I went though IVF with both of my kids. I am not shy from sharing it but it is a topic I don’t volunteer to talk about. I’m sorry you had to feel alone going through miscarriage. I wish you the best with the remaining of you pregnancy!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:11 pm

      Hi Trang, thanks so much for continuing to read, and also for sharing your experience. IVF is an incredible commitment in itself and I’m so happy to hear about your pregnancies and kids now.

  • Ngoc
    March 6, 2017 at 1:15 pm

    Congratulations to you and your family, Katherine! Also, thank you for sharing your experience with us. I greatly appreciate hearing your voice and the strength that it takes to make public something so personal. I wish you all the best as your family takes on this next stage with your exciting addition.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:11 pm

      Thanks so much Ngoc!

  • Susan
    March 6, 2017 at 1:51 pm

    Wishing you all good health and happiness in this pregnancy and to your family. I don’t often contribute but so appreciate your blog, especially the book/magazine article recommendations which are usually new to me (on the other side of the Atlantic) and I usually really enjoy. Susan, London

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:12 pm

      Thank you Susan ! I always love hearing from readers outside of the US!

  • Joyce
    March 6, 2017 at 2:20 pm

    Katherine, Happy Anniversary to!
    Thanks for sharing your story. It’s beautiful and I’d love to read more about your journey, although I am not a mom (and perhaps never will be due to a lot of reasons).
    We never know what life has in store for us, and your story inspires us to learn to let go of our “plans”. Part of the fun is to let life unfold itself, go with the flow, and enjoy every moment.
    I can’t believe what I just typed here – as I’m a control freak and has plans for the next life already. 🙂
    Fear is one of our biggest enemies. As women we tend to be harsh on ourselves, but keep in mind that we have all we need to live life fully!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:12 pm

      Thank you Joyce. I totally understand what you mean about the control freak and letting go. I hope you are having fun and enjoying some less “planned” time as well!

  • Irina
    March 6, 2017 at 2:32 pm

    Congrats Kat and the rest is the family! Does the #2 have the same due date as the first one? I feel your guilt so much but you know what. On noone’s grave is says I wish I worked more. As cliche as it sounds, work is always there for you, probably, this time when your kid grows will never repeat itself. I work part time now but mainly to stay sane, and to help out. I’m sure everything will turn out the best way possible! And you can always complain to us, we love you regardless:) have a good rest of the pregnancy!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:13 pm

      Thanks so much Irina! I hope your little one is well. Number two is a little earlier than the first one!

  • Lara
    March 6, 2017 at 3:39 pm

    congrats Kat – 4 months ago I delivered my fifth child and like with the fourth went back to work after 2 weeks – however my job is mostly working from home, research, while for teaching I leave a few hours in the day – maybe working from home could be an option? this is the second time I am having two under two, and man, the first time round I was 30, now I am almost 40, and it is a struggle. my body after all these pregnancies is in dire need of an overhaul, i.e. weight loss and exercise, but none of it matters when I look at my kids. it is a lot of fun to have older kids around, they are about to be teenagers so I am trying to enjoy the calm before the storm…
    i honestly wish I had taken more time for the second one who experienced a full-time, 8 hours a day working mum, it is something I can never ‘fix’, so don’t feel guilty, you can always work on your career but your kids’ years will fly by :). enjoy it to the fullest!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:14 pm

      5th child! You are a true hero!! Do the older kids help? That’s what I heard, at least….thanks so much for sharing your own experiences. Again, you’re a superwoman!

  • Audrinajulia
    March 6, 2017 at 4:49 pm

    Oh Katherine, first congrats on the new family addition and to your blog as well! Six years is a milestone and you’ve done very well in writing and giving informative post.

    In motherhood, i know that life will be far from what you already started ( career wise ) and expected since the beautiful “chaos” ( being a mom ) will be tough in some point. But grace will always be there seeing your bundles of joy and that will keep you moving forward. Sometimes it’s just hard to think being an at home mom taking care of the kids. This is not a career path that anyone mold us to be from the very beginning so guilt sink in but dear Lord knows that being a mom is a career that also need an expertise in some point. Like you i can go on talking about it, but i would not here, i just want you to know that if there will come a time that you need a circle, you can count on us too here, beside most of us is a mom also aside from all the sidings of life and style that we shower in our daily endeavor to keep us going from the path we call motherhood,

    Best regards and praying for your safe pregnancy all through out. Again, congrats on the six years and more to come!


    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:14 pm

      Thanks for your kind words Angie, for sharing your own experiences and your lovely offers of support.

  • irenewong
    March 6, 2017 at 4:55 pm

    Congrats Katherine and take care too.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:15 pm

      Thanks Irene!

  • Yumi
    March 6, 2017 at 7:19 pm

    Congratulations Kat! I’m super excited to hear your family is growing! In regards to the fear of handling two under two: if we aren’t scared or daunted by our choices in life then we’re not allowing ourselves to grow and learn! Easily said by someone who has no children and gets 8 hours of sleep a night 🙂

    I’ve been reading your blog for so long that it feels like I know you – I still get really excited whenever I see posts come up from you because I know that I will learn something new.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:15 pm

      Thanks so much Yumi, what a wonderful and kind thing to say. I am jealous of your 8 hours but also hope you are enjoying them very much! 🙂

  • Anna
    March 6, 2017 at 7:47 pm

    Hearty congratulations on baby #2 and blog anniversary! Thank you so much Kat for sharing your personal experiences! I was reading this in the office during coffee break and had to run to the restroom because I was tearing up… I can relate so much to… the fear of a miscarriage. A mother’s heart is hard to rationalize sometimes. And thank you for sharing your career choices. I’m due with baby #1 this summer, and thought I would go quickly back to work after using up my paid maternity leave. Now I would go into it with more of an open mind though after reading your post. I’ve stressed a lot about the implications of having a baby on my career too. I’ve also been driven, paid for an expensive graduate degree and bought into the idea of leaning in. It was a big struggle to turn down job offers that almost look like my dream job. It was difficult not to get the promotion I deserve and feeling powerless to negotiate with a big belly and maternity leave impending. Really appreciate some of the articles you’ve shared here and sharing your personal experiences. It made me realize I’m not alone and that struggles are real and that leaning out of a career and into another aspect of life (family) is a choice we should embrace too. Again, congratulations and thank you!

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:17 pm

      Hi Anna, congratulations on your upcoming little one! I’m so sorry to hear about some of your struggles and I understand them very well as I went through quite a few of them myself. You do feel “powerless” especially in a certain sort of workplace. My advice would be to keep an open mind like you said, and not beat yourself up for whatever choice you end up making (easier said than done, I know). Congratulations again!

  • Oonagh
    March 6, 2017 at 8:09 pm

    Many congratulations, and you look fabulous. Lovely dress.

    • Katherine
      March 6, 2017 at 8:17 pm

      Thank you Oonagh!

  • Sammie
    March 6, 2017 at 9:04 pm

    Congratulations Katherine! I am so happy to hear another baby is on the way.

    This post really hit home for me. I had two miscarriages before my two boys (two under two!). So I understand the anxiety and fears you’re going through. It was hard for me to go to all of the extra doc appointments, lugging along a toddler.

    I quit my job/career and was a SAHM for about 1.5 years and realize how much I sucked at it. It truly is one of the most difficult jobs to have. I recently returned to the workforce and chose to retire from private practice altogether and instead chose a job that still allowed me to use my legal skills yet was flexible enough for me to be there for my family. There are days where I struggle with my decision, but as time goes by I am realizing that it was/is the best decision for my current lifestyle.

    I am certain the decision you made was the best for your family and I wish you all the best with this new chapter of your life. Let the fun times begin; TWO is a game changer 🙂

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:44 pm

      Hi Sammie, thank you so much and I’m really sorry to hear about your miscarriages. Thanks so much for sharing your experiences…and you must be a supermama with two little boys under two!!

  • guest
    March 6, 2017 at 10:23 pm

    Congratulations on baby #2! And I’m so sorry about your miscarriage. I can only imagine how emotionally painful that experience has been for you, an emotional pain that probably never goes away. Thank you for sharing your life with us. I’ve been reading your well-rounded blog since Day 1 and appreciate the “realness” you share with your readers.

    • guest
      March 6, 2017 at 10:28 pm

      Oh if you wouldn’t mind sharing your love story of how you and your husband met and how he proposed, that would be very inspiring for your readers!

    • anonymous
      March 6, 2017 at 10:29 pm

      Oh if you wouldn’t mind sharing your love story of how you and your husband met and how he proposed, that would be very inspiring for your readers!

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:45 pm

      Thank you so much for reading and your kind comments! My husband and I have a kind of boring love story, we met at work 🙂 But maybe one day I’ll share the sparse details!

  • Revanche @ A Gai Shan Life
    March 6, 2017 at 10:36 pm

    Happy anniversary, and so much happy wishes for you and your family’s incoming new little one!
    I’m ever so sorry to hear of your loss before this. Many friends have had similar losses and my heart goes out to every one of you as I know it’s such a difficult experience. My mom had a miscarriage before I was carried to term so I had a quite early introduction to the subject growing up, I knew it must have been hard for her, for my tough immigrant mom to even mention it! I hope it helps to know you’re not alone and that other people can share their experiences with you if that would help you find peace.
    As to the guilt – that’s so tough! We have such high expectations for ourselves, I know it’s hard not to see the “shoulds”. If it helps, you might consider looking at this as another phase that will soon segue into the next phase and your only real “should” is to make the best possible choice for you and your family. Hopefully with a minimum of guilt, because your job is already hard enough!
    I hope you’ll continue to write as much as you feel comfortable doing.
    Thanks for sharing all these years, it’s been a pleasure to have a peek into your thoughts and world from time to time.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:47 pm

      Thanks so much Revanche, and the same goes to you!

  • karen
    March 6, 2017 at 10:55 pm

    omg! Congrats darling! so exciting!! <3

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:47 pm

      Thank you!! XO

  • Tracy
    March 7, 2017 at 12:11 am

    Congratulations on the baby and the blog anniversary! Thank you for sharing your life, it’s been really inspiring. I’d love to read about your thoughts and feelings about pregnancy, work-family-life balance and child-rearing, you don’t have to be modest about it. 🙂

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:48 pm

      Thank you Tracy! 🙂

  • christine brightside
    March 7, 2017 at 12:15 am

    Congrats to #2 first :-))) and also thank you for sharing your thoughts career-wise and the miscarriage. In my personal opinion, I think it is a shame that women think they need to keep it secret, and I find it so very disturbing that it is often “shrugged off” by people. I do not have children but when Chriselle Lim shared her miscarriage story on youtube, I somehow felt I could follow all the pain that women go through mostly all by themselves bc this topic is regarded as inappropriate in this high glossy-instagram-pregnancy-stories.

    Also thank you for sharing your story about your career and work context. My husband and I are currently discussing “the baby issue.” I always thought that my career is top priority, as I have also worked really hard to become who I am and be in the job position I am in today, and I think I couldn’t stand the fact of exchanging my career with motherhood at home with a baby. But on the other hand, I wouldn’t want to have children raised and looked after by someone else most of the time (as my parents were both working when I was little)… now I am turning 36 soon, and I know friends who are around 45 who do not have children and have a happy fulfilled life, I know children are not necessarily a must-have; however, I feel that I personally at least want to give it a try within the next two years. If it doesn’t happen, it is not meant to happen. The struggle I have is about letting my career go (at least for a while), knowing very well that complaining about it is quite embarrassing because it is a real first-world-problem … instead, I should let go of all feeling of guilt and be glad about the fact that we could realize me staying at home full time. But I can totally relate to what you have written. Most mothers I know feel guilty leaving the baby with someone else to go to work because they need to earn some extra money, and I feel guilty the other way round… what illogical mess! At the end of the day, everyone should work out what is best for yourself and not let other people/family/society/whoever affect what might be the right and best solution for yourself. The more I deal with this questions, I come to the conclusion that no other topic is so dominated by other people’s opinions, and yet everyone else knows everything better and never refrains with good advice. I never listened to what others told me career-wise, I always did what I though was right and was good for me. And I think I will try to do exactly the same when it comes to baby and “management of family”-decisions.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:49 pm

      Thanks so much Christine, and also for sharing your experience. Honestly, reading your comment, I think that you will have your own debates and go back and forth on this for a while too…it’s just the way our personalities work 🙂 But take comfort that you’re so accomplished and together, that you’ll make it work no matter what you decide. Best of luck!

  • Jessica Ng
    March 7, 2017 at 1:44 am

    Congratulations! I have been following your blog several years and I just love reading about your personal updates. Probably every mom here can relate to your parts of your experiences and feelings so please know that you are not alone and we are rooting for you! And as for your fears about the second child I know they can never be alleviated completely until they are at full term. We had difficulty getting pregnant with our last child and because of my history of having preterm labor it was a bag of mixed emotions. I lived in fear but I also relished every second of the pregnancy. For every day and doctors visit I was elated that we made it another day. (My son ended up arriving at 27 weeks.) So yay for another day of incubation within you! Just conquer and celebrate each day that you are able to provide the best environment for his/her growth. Wishing you and your family all the best!

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:50 pm

      Hi Jessica, thanks so much for sharing. I can’t imagine the stress with thinking about preterm labor and I completely relate to the “another day of incubation” victory every day. I’m so happy to hear your son arrived safe and sound!

  • Candice
    March 7, 2017 at 3:25 am

    Congratulations Katherine on baby #2! I’m very happy for you! Happy 6 years Anniversary! Been reading Feather Factor from the start! I’m sorry about your miscarriage. Like you, I have fears of getting pregnant again. My son is turning 3 this year and I still have hesitations on getting pregnant again. I put my work on hold when I had my son. Sometimes I feel like I would want to go to work full time again. I really can relate a lot on what you are going thru. Thank you for sharing your life experiences with us. It’s a relief not being alone in feeling like this at times. The struggles we go through as mothers and our careers on hold. I wish you all the best!

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:50 pm

      Thanks so much Candice. Best of luck with your own family planning…three is such a fun age so I’m sure it’s a struggle whether to go back to that “new baby” period right now.

  • KC
    March 7, 2017 at 6:13 am

    Hi Katherine,
    Long time reader of the blog, look forward to weekend update and any other updates you post during the week. On Fridays I am always looking for you posts. Congratulations on baby #2 and the anniversary. You are an accomplished woman in my book.

    I have struggled with that same thoughts you have now when my kids were very little. What do I do with my education? Does doing a job give me more respect? Am I defining my life through my job? Why cant I have a great job and also be there for my kids? I quit when the kids were 8 and 5. But staying at home was not for me. In 6 months I was back in the job market but wanted a more flexible work from home job. I was able to land it and I feel I cannot complain. After 5 years staying home, now sometimes I think I should have leaned in and accomplished more. I dont know what the more is…..My kids are older now and I am participating in more activities that give me a sense of worth. (womens march in dc, talking about women in politics at college, volunteering, donating time and money to causes that I support)
    If it helps, I dont regret quitting and taking a flex time job for lower pay as I spent time with my kids. No one can give what you can give your kids. But do what is best for you and your family. Hang in there. Enjoy everyday with your kids as they are going to grow up fast.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts and making me part of the conversation.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:53 pm

      Hi KC, thanks so much for sharing your experience. I ask those same questions to myself over and over. I’m happy to hear that you don’t regret quitting and it sounds like you found a job that was a great fit for you. I can imagine that what you are doing now must be incredibly fulfilling as well.

  • Helen
    March 7, 2017 at 8:01 am

    Congratulations on the pregnancy, and thank you for sharing. Miscarriages and guilt are tough topics! I think your blogging has got to be one of the most healthy things you’re doing. Several years ago I watched a college friend devolve from the most witty career driven woman into a complete Barney brain. My mother similarly dedicated her life to raising kids, and continues to guilt us for her sacrifice (rather than choice) even though we are grown. I too had a miscarriage, but the silver lining was the test run it afforded me on what I’m determined NOT to freak out about the next time. Pregnancy is like suddenly developing a chronic illness. You go from being healthy and never needing a doctor to constantly never knowing if you’re gonna be ok or hit wth another complication. It makes you feel old. Fingers crossed that it’s smoother sailing for you now. With your thoughtfulness, I have no doubt you’ve got the car pointed in the right direction.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:53 pm

      Thanks so much Helen! And I laughed at “Barney Brain”

  • minju lee
    March 7, 2017 at 9:41 am

    Congratulations, Kat!!! So happy to hear about your pregnancy, and very sorry to hear about the hardships with miscarriage. Also, I am very thankful that you shared your narrative about being a stay-home mom and an ambitious career woman. When I was younger, I used to think that it was such a waste that my mom, who attended a very prestigious school and is a licensed pharmacist, was a stay home mom for 20+ years to take care of me and my sister. Now that I have friends and colleagues with kids (and older and a bit wiser!), I know better that parenthood is an incredibly important job (and a career if one chooses so!), and a financially conscious decision for many families. I also used to think that I would never, ever become a stay at home mom. I’m still a few years from marriage and kids, but already so, my narrative is changing to “I’ll make the decision for me and my family when the time comes.” It helps a lot when other accomplished, career-oriented women like yourself speak out about their experiences.

    My female colleagues actually face a similar but different problem of feeling so much guilt for not being enough of a parent at home. I think it is a pressure that many of us put on ourselves because women can be such overachievers, and our society doesn’t make it any easier 🙂

    Anyway, the bit that I want to emphasize is that I am so happy for you and your growing family! And I hope that you will continue to blog, because your blog’s insightfulness is beyond any other blogs I’ve read. And, like many readers here, Go Bears!

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:54 pm

      Thanks so much Minju and it sounds like you are evolving to a much more relaxed place than I was in when I first decided to stay at home. Enjoy your freedom now…and Go Bears 🙂

  • Jaime Stephens
    March 7, 2017 at 10:20 am

    Katherine, I know that my sister, Whitney, if she were still around, would join me in congratulating you and wishing you the very best.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:55 pm

      Thanks so much Jaime. I miss Whitney’s wonderful comments and infectious spirit. I hope you and the family are doing well.

  • Jun
    March 7, 2017 at 1:16 pm

    Congratulations and may you have a happy and uneventful pregnancy! Also thank you for writing this honest and touching post.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:55 pm

      Thank you Jun!

  • Lilian
    March 7, 2017 at 2:06 pm

    Congratulations! Good vibes and best wishes for everyone. Lots of rest, laughs, and hugs with Baby Feather, and TLC for you!
    And yes, having two very young kids under 2 (or 3, or 4, or 5) is no easy feat. It goes by super-duper fast. I did pretty much the same thing you’re doing (overpriced degrees, etc., etc.) and stayed home for 4 years with both my kiddos. Went back when my youngest turned one, which basically made him a daycare baby from that point on.
    My oldest stayed home up until he was 2, mostly because he had some delays that required lots of therapy – speech, physical, occupational. It wasn’t easy. It wasn’t easy wrangling him (and a newborn) to appointments and stuff, but we survived. My husband’s job was super-hectic and required some travel, so there was that as well, and my parents (and his!) live outside the country, so no help whatsoever.
    7 years later, they’re at school, full-time. I’m back working full-time as well. Yes, a lot of my peers are WAY ahead – directors, junior VPs, and alladat. I wouldn’t trade it AT ALL. A better situation for your family-life-work balance will miraculously appear when you’re ready for it, and the best part? You’ll know when everyone is ready.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:55 pm

      Thanks Lilian, you’re amazing for doing all of that, and without help. I really relate to many aspects of your experience and I’m glad to hear that you are back at work and don’t regret your decisions!

  • Lilian
    March 7, 2017 at 2:11 pm

    …and a big hug for you, because so sorry for your loss. There are no words. (HUG)

  • Brook
    March 7, 2017 at 4:33 pm

    Congratulations – on the baby and the web site birthday. Thank you so much for all the time and effort you put into sharing with us.

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:56 pm

      Thank you Brook!

  • Y
    March 7, 2017 at 4:44 pm

    Thanks for sharing your story about miscarriage. I have no idea how it feels to be in that situation, so I only hope the joy of bringing a new one will slowly help you recover and Congratulations on the new one! Our lives are pretty much running in parallel.
    Right after my first one’s first birthday, we learn’t I was pregnant with our second one who is due in a couple of months from now. So yes, I have signed up for 2under2 as-well without knowing what it might entail, but I will surely follow your journey to get some inspiration on how to have a well balanced life 🙂
    I always came here for travel inspiration/suggestions since we are(were) into traveling though at a much much smaller budget 🙂 Yours is the only blog I continued reading after having a baby and after graduating into 30’s since this was the only one that stayed relevant.
    When I first came to know about my pregnancy, we had to cut short our trip to japan. When you posted some of your Japan travel around the same time, I was kind of Jealous that you still have the luxury to do what you were doing earlier. Lo and behold, you announced your first pregnancy at the same time too! You continued to be entrepreneurial, you continued to read, you continued to be fashionable, you continued to maintain this blog all through your pregnancy and with a baby/toddler. I have no idea how you do it. while I don’t have the luxury to stay home and quit my job, I do feel that being a stay at home mom is not that easy either. Please continue to share your journey with your pregnancy and handling 2under2, because it is as relevant to me now as your travel posts were back then 🙂

    • Katherine
      March 7, 2017 at 8:57 pm

      Hi Y, it does sound like we are on very similar paths! Thanks so much for reading and congrats on baby #2! Are you due after summer? I’ll try to share what I learn about 2 under 2 and yes…good luck to both of us! 🙂

      • Y
        March 7, 2017 at 10:39 pm

        I am due end of April Katherine. First one was a summer baby(July). Yes, good luck to us!

  • L.F.
    March 8, 2017 at 11:42 am

    Congratulations to you and your family on the happy new addition and to your blog’s birthday!! I have been an avid reader for quite a few years now. I’ve always loved the content you put forth. All your posts are well written and beautifully curated. I’d love to read more about your experiences on motherhood/parenthood, etc as I hope to start that next chapter of my life this year. Best wishes on a safe and healthy pregnancy!

    • Katherine
      March 10, 2017 at 8:19 am

      Thanks very much L.F.!

  • Ava
    March 8, 2017 at 4:12 pm

    Dearest, Dearest Katherine,

    WHAT WONDERFUL NEWS!!! Congratulations to you and your family on the newest member-to-be! How exciting! 🙂 I am so happy for you! I am sure Baby Feather will be a wonderfully loving big brother 🙂

    I am so deeply sorry for the loss you and your family endured with the miscarriage. That is so hard to overcome and not be afraid of after it happens – I know you are strong and you will persevere! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers for a happy and healthy pregnancy and easy delivery! I know it’s tough now from the sounds of it but hopefully all the sickness will ease up in a few weeks?

    Big Brava to you and your 6 year anniversary on the blog! How many lives you have touched and changed with FEATHER FACTOR – a baby and creation in itself that you should feel very proud of! I know I am not speaking alone when I write that your blog has been an escape for many during tough times and even as a vicarious getaway when you share with us your travel experiences for those of us who can’t travel and when you share your well thought out purchases which help us make informed decisions on our future purchases as well as the many interviews you do with interesting people from all over – it is truly a joy and a pleasure to read! Thank you! And here’s to 60 more years! 😉

    I don’t think you need to worry about your decision to stay at home and be with the kids. I understand your fears and concerns given your education but that education will come in handy as you raise your children and you know, you may decide to return to work part time when they are older and possibly full time, again, after the kids are off to pursue their own dreams whatever they may be. Your education and graduate school education will still come into play and I think you will surprise yourself. Besides, you never know…this blog may morph into something you never saw coming and you may choose to not return to the traditional work place setting you left!

    And while there may be many opinions already out there – I think it would behoove you to at the very least write down what you’re feeling and experiencing as someone who as you wrote didn’t even entertain a hazy notion of leaving work to having quit your job to raise your children. This especially after having endured a rigorous education and job that required a lot of travel which you previously enjoyed in a personal journal or something akin bc I think many of your readers value YOUR opinion and YOUR thoughts. Frankly, if you wrote a book about it I’d want to buy it to read what you felt. I think it would resonate with a lot of your readers, both older and younger, so regardless of how many others have already written about the struggles of balancing work life and motherhood, please do jot down a few bits and bobs for either a future “series blog posts” or for who knows, a book perchance? 🙂 When you have the time- of course – I am sure Baby Feather is handful on top of being preggo w Feather Deux. 😉

    Again, a heartfelt and warm congratulations to you and your family!

    You look wonderful BTW so enjoy the pregnancy and enjoy yourself! Things will work out with your education and job in the future, I am very confident of that! 🙂


    • Katherine
      March 10, 2017 at 8:19 am

      Ava, you have always been so encouraging and thoughtful – thank you so much for being such a wonderful reader.

  • Diane
    March 8, 2017 at 8:03 pm

    I’m sorry for your loss.
    Congratulations on your new baby….and your decision to do what’s best for you and your family.

    • Katherine
      March 10, 2017 at 8:19 am

      Thank you Diane, I appreciate your words.

  • Hui
    March 9, 2017 at 8:02 am

    Congratulations ! One child makes you a couple plus a child, two children make you a family ! Enjoy!

    • Katherine
      March 10, 2017 at 8:20 am

      Thank you Hui!

  • Katherine
    March 9, 2017 at 9:19 am

    Hi Katherine! Long time reader and I wanted to say how much I appreciated that you are talking about your struggles and guilt with not working. While I’m not at that stage of life quite yet, it may become a reality soon and it’s something I think about a lot. Congrats on the new pregnancy and best wishes for a safe rest of your pregnancy and a healthy baby!

    • Katherine
      March 10, 2017 at 8:20 am

      Thanks very much Katherine 🙂

  • Amanda
    March 9, 2017 at 10:34 am

    Hi Katherine! I am a long time reader and I want to say how courageous you are to make a tough decision to stay home for your family. I had to do something similar – leave a high paying, high trajectory career in order to have more time with my children- and it was one of the toughest decisions. Staying home with kids is definitely a hard job for me too! But it was all worth it, I occasionally feel guilt, unappreciated and envy but I never regretted it. Congratulations and best wishes!

    • Katherine
      March 10, 2017 at 8:21 am

      Thanks so much for your kind words and sharing your own experiences. Very helpful to hear from others going through a similar experience 🙂

  • Nancy
    March 10, 2017 at 6:13 pm

    Long time reader and a fellow Cal grad (Go Bears!) thank you for sharing! I am currently unmarried and without kids but i always wonder what my future will hold in store. I see the struggle with my colleagues where I work and I give props to any new mom and whatever decision she makes re: whether to quit to stay at home with the child or to return to work (and making it work). Thank you for being so open, honest and courageous in sharing your stories!

  • Usha
    March 10, 2017 at 10:03 pm

    Flexible work arrangements go really far in making things work in our household. I do two days of work from home (and have flexibility with hours) and that has been immensely helpful – We get to cuddle whenever we feel like, our nursing relationship has remained strong, and I don’t feel like I am missing out as he grows up. In fact I have found that I am a better mum for being able to have something else to focus on for a few hours a day (and frankly the $ is good). Find YOUR balance – no two families are the same. I look forward to hearing more about how you make it work. And of course CONGRATULATIONS! Babies are just the best!

    • Katherine
      March 11, 2017 at 7:18 pm

      Two days working from home sounds absolutely perfect. Thank you for sharing your experience 🙂

  • Anonymous
    March 11, 2017 at 6:45 am

    Congrats to you! I got so sick during my second pregnancy too, so sick I didn’t really tell people neither, nor did I really announced my pregnancy because I didn’t really feel like it. Keep it to yourself sometimes is just what you need, you don’t need to share everything to the whole world if you don’t feel like it. But I am so happy that you are expecting again and it will all come together.

    I have so much to share but I rather share it in private and in person. Bottom line is, I love my boys, if i were to do it over and over again, I would and I hope you will feel the same when you meet your second one

    • Katherine
      March 11, 2017 at 7:19 pm

      Thank you so much!

  • Sonita
    March 11, 2017 at 10:27 am

    Congratulations, Katherine! What an amazing life journey you have had (and will continue to have)! Make the choice that works for you, don’t feel guilty and enjoy the ride!

    • Katherine
      March 11, 2017 at 7:19 pm

      Thanks my friend!! 🙂

  • Cherry
    March 11, 2017 at 7:57 pm

    Congrats! I have two kids, back to back! My first born, a son, was in day care for 4 months until I decided to quit my job because of the face he gives me when I leave him there (LOL). I honestly did not find it hard having two kids (except for the not sleeping well for 9 months part!), by the next kid, you are pretty much an expert 😉 My kids do everything together, they share the same friends, etc. I love that they entertain each other, too. There’s no guilt if I don’t do play dates. Once my daughter is in Kindergarten I will go back to work. Money is just never enough, but most importantly, at least for me, is the workplace social life. I miss that.

    Enjoy and congrats again!

  • Vivian
    March 13, 2017 at 11:22 am

    I’m so Happy for you both….Mr and Mrs Feather!!! I’m that reader who’s been with you when you completed the MBA, married with Mr Feather, had the first child. It feels like a true friend in my life. Congratulations ❤️❤️❤️

    • Katherine
      March 14, 2017 at 8:52 am

      Thanks so much Vivian! It’s been great to see your blog and IG grow over the years too 🙂 You always have beautiful taste and selections.

  • Jo
    March 15, 2017 at 12:55 am

    Hi Katherine, thank you for always sharing so candidly. So sorry to hear about your miscarriage and I wish you a smooth and healthy pregnancy with baby feather 2.0. I hardly read blogs these days but yours is one I continue to read regularly. Happy blog anniversary!

  • Bee
    March 15, 2017 at 12:47 pm

    Congratulations to you! Best wishes for a healthy and easy pregnancy/delivery. I also hope you’ll do more posts on motherhood related topics – from the many many comments it seems it’s a topic of much interest. Thank you for sharing your experience with loss – so many women suffer in silence which is so isolating. Brave women like you help break the stigma surrounding pregnancy loss by coming forward and sharing their stories. My husband and I were devastated to have my first pregnancy end in a stillbirth at 23 weeks in 2016. I’m now pregnant again, and am counting down the days as hopefully as I can until my due date in April. I feel like I’ve been pregnant forever, but know all will be worth it once my baby is in my arms.
    Here’s to 6+ more years of your wonderful posts!

  • Lisa
    March 15, 2017 at 9:41 pm

    Congratulations! I have enjoyed reading your blog for the past five years. You’re writing is like having a conversation with a good friend. While our life situations are quite different I would like to share that the time you have with your children goes by faster than you realize. You won’t believe it now because the days may seem long but the years will go by in a heartbeat. I had my children very young so I was never heavily invested in a career like you have but I always tell parents of little ones that what kids really need the most are their parents. Of course I am not dismissing the physical needs that go along with that especially on the Peninsula but I don’t think you will ever regret having this time with your children. My best wishes to you and your family on your newest blessing.

  • Miranda Wong
    March 19, 2017 at 8:26 pm

    Congratulations! I have read your blog for many years, first as a working professional, and now as a mother of a two year-old myself. Keep us updated on your mom life! I love hearing about fashion, lifestyle, and product reviews from other moms.

    Are there any other blogs that you read or recommend? I follow CorporetteMoms and HelloBee, and am searching for other relevant and on-topic blogs like yours. Thanks for sharing your perspective!

  • Wendy
    March 19, 2017 at 9:18 pm

    Congratulations and many Blessings on the Baby! You look so thin! You look like you are
    all baby!

    • Katherine
      March 20, 2017 at 7:46 am

      Nicest comment, ever, ha! Thank you!

  • Rei
    March 22, 2017 at 2:27 am

    Congratulations to you and your family Katherine! Thank you for sharing your personal experience and thoughts with us. Being a mum myself, I can totally relate to everything you said, and feel quite emotional about it. Enjoy your time off, as we all know this is the most precious and rewarding time in our lives to see our children grow. I am back to the workforce full time and I feel GUILTY every day. Guilty of not being able to spend a lot of time with my child, guilty of being so tired after work so I have no energy left to play with my child. If I am blessed enough to have a second child one day, I won’t hesitate to be a stay-home mum for a few years just like you 🙂

    • Katherine
      March 23, 2017 at 9:06 pm

      Thanks so much Rei. I’m sure your little one adores you. I love seeing your photos, he’s lucky to go to so many wonderful destinations with you!